Sour Grapes for Puff West
By Father John Gibbons


In a dark room somewhere in the ass end of east Paterson, the smell of urine and marijuana tainted the air. Amidst the miasma, a young man wept and considered just where things went wrong. He thought himself to be intelligent enough. He even thought he was a genius when it came to classical guitar. In fact he could rarely find someone on his level that could appreciate him. His level...right...Currently he lay on a dark, damp floor trying to concentrate on the smell of pot which came from the next room. He wished that he could smoke some but no one was going to give him any.

There was a time in his life when he never bought weed at all. He had to put up with assholes and dick heads, but so long as they had weed, he always had something in common with them. Back in the day, he was only good for smoking up and sticking his dick in things. That all changed once he discovered he had AIDS.

He contracted the disease from some some that cunt he wasn't even fucking. She handed him her tampon while he was driving., and he threw it at some schmuck on a bike. While caught up in how funny that was, he thought nothing of shoving a piece of gum in his mouth with his bloodied fingers. The shit must have gotten into him from his tongue piercing , which had been infected earlier that day. He cursed that fucking cunt for being so stupid, and causing his current problems.

It wasn't long after this event that his bitch girlfriend made him get an AIDS test. She wouldn't let him fuck her condom less without getting a test first. It was her fucking fault that he knew he had AIDS. If she would have just shut-the-fuck-up and let him fuck her without a frigging rubber, then he would have no problems today. Fucking CUNT!!!

From that point on, he was a fucking asshole to everyone. That was, in his mind, his only mistake. The dick heads who used to smoke him up, would no longer have anything to do with him. How could they do that to HIM??!!! He put up with their shit for so long. It would only be fair if they put up with his. ASSHOLES!!

He showed them though. He got a job as a florist. In the corner of the green house he grew his own weed. Just for him. Fuck those assholes. He had no need of them anymore. And to hell with them. They weren't gettin' their hands on it.

Hands...that brought back painful memories for him. Even the taste of his home grown pot made him yearn for his better days. He would have given anything to have his old sensations back again, because after that, he lost everything.

His boss from the florist fired him when she found his stash. The fucking bitch just wouldn't listen when he told her that it wasn't his and he never did drugs ever. She fucking fired him for THAT!!

He rubbed his mutilated genitalia on the damp concrete floor, imagining he was raping one of the fucking bitches that put him here. USELESS!! He damned them! He damned his fucking useless prick! Disgusted, he rolled over, propped himself against the cinder block wall and urinated on the stained floor, as if it would remove his present dilemma as well as his bladder. He remembered bitterly back to when he tried to get his life straight. When he made an attempt to live unselfishly, and come to terms with his problems rather than avoiding them. He thought of this now because that was when he
met the bastard who would later castrate him. All that he was able to do was lie against the wall and shout, " FUCK YOU!!!" at the top of his lungs. All that would come out of his mouth though, was a sound that sounded like a mating whale. After that he broke down and cried again.

After he lost his job at the florist, he volunteered at an AIDS clinic. They gave him the drugs that he needed to battle his AIDS. He wished it was weed, like the weed he could smell coming from the next room. The AIDS drugs just made him sick. He did not make enough money at the clinic to buy weed with. The only reason he worked there at all was for the medical benefits. He needed to go to the dentist for a root canal that was long over due. He just totally felt like shit.

He went to the dentist so ,at least , he could have healthy teeth. The dentist asked him if he wanted general or local anesthesia. He replied that he'd rather get some pot and go home. Little did he know that he'd never do either again. That bastard dentist told him that he had major connections in Paterson and that he would give him all the weed he could ever want. All he had to do was submit to what the dentist called 'light experimental dental surgery.' So he figured, what the hell, it couldn't be as bad as AIDS'. Plus his mouth jonsed for any weed at all, let alone a constant supply. He was convinced that the idea was a mighty attractive offer. The dentist closed up shop early and said that they'd have to do the job at his Paterson apartment as to not get caught. They hopped in the dentists car and were on their way. He should have figured something wasn't right when he noticed the dentists apartment was littered with various pieces of bizarre surgical equipment. He began to have second thoughts. He should have asked for the weed in advance. He should have run away. He should have done anything but lie down on that surgical table. When the dentist told him to relax and that a general anesthetic would make sure he never knew what hit him. He just stared blankly at the mirrored ceiling and faded out shortly after the injection was given.

He thought that he was dreaming. He thought it was a weird side effect of the anesthetic. When he began to wake up, he didn't feel right anymore. The first thing he noticed was his inability to roll over on his side into a fetal position like the way he normally slept. He was relieved to feel the restraint across his chest, but found it strange that he lacked the strength to unbuckle it. In fact, all his extremities and limbs were still pretty numb. When he tried to open his eyes, he was shocked to find that they were taped shut. He tried to call out to the dentist, but the only sound he could make was a muddled gurgling noise. When he felt the gauze against the inside of his cheek, he attempted to spit it out, but his jaw wouldn't budge, and felt almost clamped shut. The anxiety of not knowing what had been done to him was driving him crazy. He was only glad that his teeth weren't hurting yet, because with all that gauze in his mouth, that bastard must have done some serious damage.

The dentist must have heard the disturbing noises that he was making because he felt a tube slide up his nose and liquid drip down the back of his throat. He felt a pin prick in his side and he was out again.

The next time he awoke he was disoriented. His eyes were still taped shut and he was just as paralyzed as earlier. He felt like he hadn't eaten in days. A feeling of hope overcame him when he smelled pot in the air, and thought that soon he'd be able to smoke a bowl and forget about all of this shit. He struggled to get free, but his arms and legs were like lead. The twisting of his torso revealed something indescribable about the way the restraint chafed against his chest. He also noticed that his hair now brushed the back of his ears. His head was near shaven when he lied down, what was going on here? How long had he been here? He tried to call out, but his mouth was still filled with gauze. When he tried to open his mouth, he was only able to move his lips across the gauze. His whole face felt soft like jelly. His jaw still must've been clamped. He couldn't even play with his frigging tongue ring because his mouth was so fucking confined. He tried and tried but he couldn't even engage in his favorite nervous habit. He heard laughing coming from down the hall and foot steps. He longed to be freed from this fucking trap. The dentist said,'Look, its awake now. It should be ready by now." and someone else chuckled.

He felt the tape being torn away from his eyelids, along with a few eyelashes. It took his eyes a moment to get used to the light, and when they did, his brain was not able to comprehend what stared back at him from the ceiling. The dentist mocked, "If you like that, you'll love you're new smile!!!" and he removed the gauze from his mouth, laughing all the while. The young man lay there, in absolute shock. Speechlessness did not begin to describe his state. He fixated his eyes blankly at the breast implants which were now the least offensive part of his anatomy. If he still had his arms they would be punching. If his legs were still a part of his body, he'd try to run away from this nightmare. Walking or even crawling were just not an option anymore. When the gauze was removed from his crotch, a stumpy half inch pisshole was all that was recognizable of his cock. The worst of all was that his jaw bone along with his teeth and tongue were all missing. He lied there staring at his hideous reflection and his face which bore a permanent pucker, as if his mouth were removed and replaced with an asshole. A fleshy, useless hole... an orifice was what he had become. His mind all but snapped when he tried to extend his jaw and scream but was unable to do anything except shake his head frantically ,as if that would help, and make a twisted guttural shriek from his throat which was only muddled further by his vestigial lips. He wouldn't accept the creature in his reflection as being the body he had used his entire life. All of the things that he never got a chance to do raced through his broken mind. He couldn't punch the table, kick the walls, or even make a sound that he was trying to. in his new form, all method of expression had left him . The tears welled up and rolled down to where his chin used to be. The two men in the room were in stitches laughing. The dentist picked up the deformed frame like a sack of potatoes as it made indescribable noises , meant to be protests and reasons why this could not be real and could not be done to him. ( The noises may have even been a an attempt to tell them he had AIDS in a last ditch effort to stop them from what was about to ensue.) He wanted desperately to play with the tongue ring which wasn't there. They brought it to a dark chamber as it tried to slither away. And as they fucked all that was fuck able on what remained of the young man, he realized that his life would never be in his control again.

He felt the disgusting matted hair rest against his augmented breasts, which were by now encrusted with dirt and wet from sweat and piss. He wondered how much more of this he could take before they killed them. He wished he could do it himself. He wished that cunt had never given him AIDS. He wished that he had a fucking joint. He wished that he had all of his joints. As if in response, the door slammed open ,bringing in a cloud of pot smoke. The two men walked in as they had for months now. He tried to concentrate on the smell of pot on their clothes. He was even grateful that they removed his tongue so he didn't have to taste the semen on top of feeling it seep down his throat. They eventually left him on the piss lined on floor to dream of highs that he would never know again and smell the joint that they will always share in the next room.